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Well! Father's Day is here (whether we like it or not -which, honestly we don't?). But we kind of (REALLY) love how @ylime210 celebrated a few years ago. Thanks for giving us a much-needed laugh today.
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#modernloss #1deaddad #deaddadsclub #missingdad #missyoudad #imissmydad #grievingdaughter #grievingson #grievingwife #cluboflostdaughters #fatherlessdaughter #fatherlessson #adultorphan #goodgrief #forevermissed #griefsucks #deathsucks #deathanddying #loss
happy Monday morning y’all ⠀
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Time to hit the ground & work with purpose. Each day is such a gift & I hope you’re able to find a moment of peace, light & even laughter it’s good for ya ⠀
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Please comment or DM to connect. You’re not alone on your grief journey ⠀
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xo Ashley ⠀
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#griefquotes #grief #griefsupportgroup #griefsupport #grievingprocess #grieving #grievingquotes #grievingparents #grievingmother #grievingwife #grievingsister #siblinglosssurvivor #stillbornstillloved #lifeafterloss #grievingmama #grievingson #rainbowbridge #traumasurvivor #ptsdrecovery #goodvibes #goodmorning
I Am Her. - Mike Bauer
Grief and Loss.
Loss and Grief.
One follows the other surely as night follows day. How dark and how long that night will be - well - that depends doesn’t it…
Death is an indiscriminate force from which nobody escapes - we cope with this construct because we have expectations. There are “norms” to which we hope our lives will conform: our children will die after us, our parents before - and not in untimely or tragic ways, but peacefully after long lives.
My father’s death was sudden but not totally unexpected - he had beaten the odds of not making it to 50 and by leaving us on the golf course at age 75 - we were able to reflect on a full life, well lived. I loved him very much and the pain was dreadful, it took me a year to stop feeling discombobulated and another to fully process it - but time and grief did their jobs and on looking back - it was a pretty “normal” experience.
But what if that isn’t your experience? What if the life you loved was cut short - what if their death was neither timely or peaceful? What do you do then? There is no “normal’ for this - there is no handbook that addresses your very personal set of circumstances. A person’s grief is as unique as the relationship they had with the one they lost and tragic circumstances can make it a very long, very dark and very dangerous process.
And so we cope the best we can, we have communities and counselors to help, we have playlists like this that evoke empathy with music that might resonate with you - where you can hear and see that someone else went through it and perhaps you don’t have to be so alone on your journey.
Mike Bauer wrote such a song about losing his mother - if you know someone in a similar space - it might help… “My mom was everything... When she unexpectedly passed in 2014 I had a really tough time finding my footing again. This song is the closest I’ve ever come to reflecting a true feeling in the way it sounds. From the vocal line in which I fought back tears throughout recording to the last two voicemails I had left from her introducing and concluding the track. It’s heart-wrenching. It’s very on the nose. But’s honest as hell.
My mommy...how I do miss you. I start to think of her and my eyes well up...and I shut it down...I know how much being a mother meant to her...she lost the only woman she ever knew as her mother at the tender age of 15...she died in her arms...alone in their home...she never recovered...it forever changed the course of her life...depression...panic...anxiety...she put all of her love into her boys...her nest...she passed on her pain as a heirloom to me and I carry that in my heart...I always understood her pain...even when she couldn’t talk about her past...I understood. We had a bond of love and connectivity that few boys had...she let me do her hair and make up and pick out her clothes...it was our secret...it was the 1970s after all and we knew my dad and other kids could never know...she fostered my creativity...my art...crafts essential to my survival in that brutal industrialized world of bullying. She was my salvation and that feeling stayed with me until she drew her last breath. Today I don’t dwell in the loss...it takes everything I have to not live in the past...to remember but also forget so I am desensitized by the loss. Loss is something you never recover...but it doesn’t have to be the end of your happiness. I won’t allow it and I honor Nancy Lee by working everyday to remove the stain of her loss on my life...because there is a whole other life to live that I will miss stuck in the past. I love you mommy. You are always tucked neatly in my heart. #mothersday #mothers #motherloss #death #grieving #grievingprocess #grievingmother #grievingson #grievingdaughter #grievinggayguy #mothers #momson #moms #mommy #family #love #oldsoul #brokenheart #depression #ptsd
I use to feel this odd sense of relief for a few moments on the 26th of December and then I will remember it’s going to be Chloe’s Birthday on the 29th of December and then the New Year Holiday and then wow I’ve made it. We’ve made it. I know we aren’t there yet. But I want to continue to encourage you to only seek what soothes your heart. And I have been asked a lot today - what if nothing soothes my Heart? Truthfully nothing may soothe it but then choose what won’t worsen it?
Decide to only find what will give you a moment of not feeling so heavy or decide to forgo the holidays all together! I don’t do much by tradition in general much less after the losses I face! Start with this, what can soothe me at this moment?
And what can I do to take care of myself?
Let’s begin there?
If I can be completely honest and transparent with you, this last year and a half has been difficult to say the least.
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After loosing my mother in August of 2017, my aunt (her sister) in September of 2018, and now my dad last week, I’m sure you can only imagine.
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You see much joy in my pictures (which is very real). There has also been some sadness (that has been expressed out in the open and even more behind closed doors).
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As we laid my dad to rest yesterday, I thought of how everything came together. Our family in Texas went above and beyond, and I will forever be great-full for them and what they’ve done for us. My sister/cousins Kedra, Tammy and Carl, this sweet lady, sister Johnson and my dads brother/best friend, uncle Lee.
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To my dad, Walter Chester McIntyre, I love you and will miss you! Rest In Heaven! Job well done!
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To everyone who has reached out to us, from the bottom of my heart, I thank you! .
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#teammac #lifewiththemcintyres #thenewhuxtables #macstrong #mcintyrestrong #veterans #grief #griefsupport #positiveblackimages #grieving #grievingprocess #grievingson #transparent #reallifestory #truelovestory #houstonnationalcemetery #boydfuneralhome #teammcintyre #ripdad #griefjourney #godisgood #godisgood #godisgoodalways #godisgood❤️
I lost my mom May 6, 2017 to cardiac arrest. She was 49. I wish I had a group of people who knew what I was going through at that time. I started a Facebook and Instagram Support Group for those of you who are suffering as well. Search “Remember Mom & Dad” in the Group section. This picture is our cover art. Please come share your story or words of comfort. For those of you suffering siltently, you are not alone. @rememberingmomanddad or https://m.facebook.com/groups/2236972106515093?ref=share
#supportgroup #supportgroups #mymomdied #mydaddied #missmymom #missmydad #heaven #grieving #grievingprocess #grievingdaughter #grievingson #grievingchildren
I've come to know that, when grieving, the worst times are right before I fall asleep. I think for me at least, I spend the day keeping busy so I don't think too much. Here's for the late nights we fight alone. I love you. .
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#Mixedboyselflove #innervoice #selflove #selfcare #Ivanna #3032poetry #brownboyjoy #grieving #grievingprocess #grievingson #latenights
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