List of the most popular hashtags for theme #EUPDRECOVERY

This has been my day. It’s hard being in a place like this, stuck indoors for 22 and a half hours a day and I’m really homesick, have been for the past few weeks. Sometimes I feel like I am getting nowhere and that actually, I’m just free labour as a decorator and OT. Sometimes, I just want a cigarette in peace and not have to make conversation. Sometimes I just want to starfish in my nice double bed at home, where I can lock my door and not have people peering through a window at me multiple times a day. I really miss my friends and family and being able to just go out as and when I like. I miss having a proper toilet seat, a proper mug and HOT water. I miss my bath, I miss being able to shave I miss the horses, I miss my cat and my rats. I have none now, I rehomed my rats and my cat is still missing. Eurgh... It’s not one single thing but a multitude of things that have made me feel like this today. But I’ve had my whinge and I guess I just have to suck it up and deal with it tonight. At least on Sunday I have some leave to go and look for Jaffa again. #baddaysbuildbetterdays #thefuckening #eupdrecovery #bpdawareness #eatingdisorderrecovery #dbtskills #eupd #bpd #bpdrecovery #ptsd #ptsdrecovery #anxiety #mentalhealth #mentalillness #mentalhealthawareness #dbt #dialecticalbehaviortherapy #inpatient #inpatienttreatment #inpatientproblems #itsokaynottobeokay #timetotalk #mentalhealthmatters #endthestigma #endmentalhealthstigma #justkeepswimming #hopetomorrowisbetter

**INSOMNIA** Ever had a night where you just toss and turn, can’t get comfortable, something is playing on your mind or you just can’t freaking drop off to dreamland? Now imagine that every single damned night, no matter how tired your body and mind is, your brain just does not allow you to sleep. Or, you get to sleep and can’t stay asleep and it just leaves you drained and depressed and bloody irritable. I have had trouble sleeping for many years now, having chronic insomnia. I can go a fair few days without sleep but mentally I become a mess. It has led to many crisis situations and admissions to acute wards where they would give me PRN meds to sleep, and I would become more stable, before being discharged home with none of those meds, just for the cycle to start again. Did you know that depriving people of sleep was and is used as a method of torture? I can see why, it really does mess you up. The less sleep you get the more your anxiety plays up and then the more anxious you are, the less you sleep and it’s a horrid cycle to be in. It doesn’t matter how much physical exercise I would do in the day, even cutting out caffeine and following sleep hygiene rules - I still would not be able to sleep. It led to me abusing my medication in order to get at least one decent sleep a week. I would buy drugs online as doctors and my community team would not do anything to help. Luckily, here, the team could see just how bad it actually is. Now I rely on prescription drugs to help me sleep and I’m on quite a bit, but it works and I sleep really well. Of course, I hope that eventually I may be able to reduce my medication. I don’t want to be taking so many meds long term, but for now, it helps an awful lot and allows me to focus on therapy. On another note; it came up on my memories that I got my semi colon/Eating disorder recover tattoo 2 years ago today #insomnia #inpatient #inpatienttreatment #insomniameds #eupdrecovery #bpdawareness #dbtskills #eupd #bpd #bpdrecovery #ptsd #ptsdrecovery #anxiety #endthestigma #mentalhealthawareness #dbt #mentalhealth #itsokaynottobeokay #timetotalk #recovery #eatingdisorderrecovery

The irony #bpdlife #bpdmeme #bpd #breakthestigma

Why are they not posting my captions!?! I said I have been really depressed and emotional and instead of doing self destructive things I’ve been writing what I am thinking as a poem. My nurse today kept asking me ‘what if’ questions and I just don’t know the answers. #eupdrecovery #bpdawareness #eatingdisorderrecovery #dbtskills #jaffathecat #bringmyboyhome #mentalhealthrecovery #mentalhealth #mentalillness #selfharm #copingskills #poetry #writing #writinghowifeel

I have literally done barely anything today. I’ve had a 3 hour nap, I felt like I needed it even though I slept for over 8hrs last night(!). I’ve gone from hardly sleeping to sleeping like a log, it might be the increase in medication though. This morning was breakfast and smoothie group which I go along to but as I have an ensure in the morning, I didn’t have anything. Then late morning we played a game called Dobble (I won every time ) and then a game of killer pool which I also won! I beat the ward manager, finally So I slept all afternoon and was woken up for dinner even though I never usually have it. BUT, today, for the first time since I have been here (7months), I had some! I haven’t had hot food for so long. Usually it’s because I haven’t been allowed to eat in my room but they allowed it today. I now have a food baby going on I’m seriously bloated as it was rice, quorn in a fajita mix and onions and peppers. Got to say, it was yummy and progress I guess #eupdrecovery #bpdawareness #eatingdisorderrecovery #dbtskills #eupdawareness #eupd #recovery #dialecticalbehaviortherapy #inpatient #inpatientrehab #inpatienttreatment #mentalhealth #mentalillness #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #progress #progressnotperfection #eatingdisorderecovery #endthestigma #endmentalhealthstigma

I sat for a long time in one spot calling Jaffa’s name, hoping he would just stroll out from the bushes. But no, no sign of him still. It’s been over a week and nothing. We have done absolutely everything we could think of, there is nothing else we could do. I sat there staring at this daisy for such a long time, I took a photo. I’m feeling awful and staff are not helping. Just before I left to look for Jaffa, they were questioning me about what I would do if I found him dead - not helpful. I came back from trying to find him to find that my room had been searched without me being here. They took things from my room which I have been allowed to have for months and won’t discuss it. And now I haven’t been allowed for my last cigarette. It’s like they are wanting me to have an incident. I have come to my room, closed the curtains, climbed into bed, cried and now I’m laying here just waiting for sleep. We’ll see what tomorrow brings #badday #eupdrecovery #bpdawareness #eatingdisorderrecovery #dbtskills #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthmatters #ptsd #ptsdrecovery #anxiety #recovery #inpatient #inpatientrehab #inpatienttreatment #inpatientproblems #keepcalmandcarryon #equestrianmentalhealth #keepcalmandrideon

Masks ~ We all change the way we look, we all try to hide our insecurities from the world by covering up who we really are. Hence me changing the way I look constantly because my head changes its mind on what I need to look like to be “perfect”. It takes a life time for some to come to terms with who they are. It’s taken me my entire life to understand who I am and to accept the help I need. It’s ok to not be happy with who you are. It’s ok to be scared of yourself and what’s behind the mask you have created for society. BUT I can assure you that what’s under the mask is wonderful, it takes time but embrace your crazy and live your best life but anything is possible. You just have to make that first step, even if it takes years✨#anythingispossible #mask #maskoff #socialanxiety #society #poetsociety #mentalhealthuk #bpdrecovery #bipolardisorderawareness #eupdsupport #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalillness #eupdlife #eupdrecovery #eupdawareness #bpdawareness #bipolar

I have no news on Jaffa at the moment In light of what has happened over the past couple of days, the worry, anxiety and my slip up with self destructive coping methods, I thought I would talk about my distraction box. They can be called distraction boxes or self soothe boxes. In here you can put anything in there that may help soothe anxiety, distract you from negative thoughts, help get you to sleep or just help relax you. You don’t necessarily have to have a box but it can be handy to have everything in one place to go to. I have a box and other things on my bedside table or shelf for easy reach. What’s in my distraction box? A fidget spinner Weighted turtle A colour changing orb light A tangle Lavender spray Lavender moisturiser Bubble wrap A coffee cup shaped scented squidgie Colouring books Puzzle books Notebook Pens and pencils Glitter Photos Cards Lollipops E cigarette tips Cushion cover Memory foam key ring Other distractions - Hama beads Playing pool Playing dobble Playing cards Listening to music My weighted blanket So if you struggle with anxiety, insomnia, depression or anything at all and think this will help, give it a go! #bpdawareness #eatingdisorderrecovery #dbtskills #equineassistedmentalhealth #anxietyrelief #mentalhealth #mentalillness #mentalhealthawareness #mindfulness #eupdrecovery #eupdawareness #ptsdrecovery #anxietyrelief #selfcare #equestrianmentalhealth #justkeepswimming