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When I was 13, I came home from school and cried into my pillow because the cute popular boy said I ‘would be’ cute if I lost a little weight.
When I was 14, a pastor’s wife referred to me as a slut and a bad influence.
When I was 15, someone’s mom told everyone I would just end up pregnant living in a trailer in someone’s backyard.
When I was 16, I broke up with my boyfriend. He wrote an ‘English paper’ about a ‘red-headed backstabbing b****’ and read it in front of the entire class (I had red hair). I cried as everyone stared at me.
When I was 17, I ate lunch in a bathroom stall by myself because I was the new girl at school and the only friend I had was out that day.
I’m 27 now. I’m a grown married woman. One thing I can tell you, looking back, I get it. I was no ‘poster child’ for a teenager. Modesty wasn’t a word in my vocabulary. Rules didn’t apply many days. I make the statement that between high school and college, I probably either did it or was in the same room as it.
However, let me be ABUNDANTLY clear, my worth was absolutely NO less then, than it is today. I was as absolutely loved then, as I am today. My dignity was the same then, as it is today. My worth has NEVER been contingent. The real problem? I never knew it. And heck, some days, I still forget that.
So the next time you feel the need to jeer at the teenage girl you don’t find modest enough. Or maybe stick your nose up at the kid that has a ‘bad reputation’. Or maybe you justify your condemnation by labeling someone as the ‘culture’ you fight against... I hope I can put a face, an actual face, to that girl, to that kid, that maybe you don’t feel fits in your ‘circle’.
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If you are a young person and if you’ve had experiences like the above. Ugh, let me tell you again and again, you are so entirely, entirely precious. The words and actions of others don’t dictate your worth. Just because something is said, doesn’t make it a part of who you are. You are more than any label or any belittling feeling. You ALWAYS have a place in this Church. You are WANTED in this Church. Anyone tells you or makes you feel differently?.... you message me.
Your words matter. Your actions are remembered.
I didn’t grow up Catholic. I didn’t come into the Church with hoards of Catholic friends and family cheering me on. Which is okay!! I love my friends and family to death and I wouldn’t be who I am today, Catholic or not, without them (love y’all )! But at the same time, there are just certain aspects of conversation that will always be ‘taboo’ or slightly ‘too Catholic’ to be able to relate.
Talk about social justice? ‘Sure!’
Talk about Jesus? ‘I can follow.’
Talk about Mary? ‘Wait... whoa...’
The priesthood? ‘Um, have you seen the news?’
Or maybe the pope? ‘Hold up...okay...go back to the Jesus part please or maybe to the ‘feeding the hungry’ part.’
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I absolutely love when I can find the common ground. It’s so stinking important but, it’s also okay to say that there are areas that we differ from the rest of the world. If they don’t differ in their understanding at all? Well... then tell them all to sign up for RCIA because that means they are Catholic . I used to struggle so hard to find every area I could relate. I minimized the differences so that being Catholic didn’t seem so radical. I would point out every similarity and downplay every difference. I wanted to make the point that Catholicism is just misunderstood (which YES it ABSOLUTELY is) but, it’s also okay to say that yeah, being Catholic does make some ‘radical’ claims.
Now, at the same time, ostracizing every non-Catholic is INCORRECT. It IS important to find our similarities, our common ground. I’ve said it before, I’ll say it a thousand times - Christ died for every person in existence. He died for that person you hate. That politician you despise. For that anti-Catholic with the mega phone that tells you you are going to hell. He loves them as much as He loves you. So yes, ostracizing is INCORRECT but we also have to be okay at recognizing where we differ. To be okay with standing out when needed. I think that some of those more ‘radical’ claims actually hold the keys to course correcting the ship of culture back to a society ordered in the way we were created.
I think it’s possible to do both.
Relate wherever possible, stand out when necessary.
St. Ann, you who trusted in God's will and gave birth to the Blessed Mother, pray with us for the ministry of Catholic family life and keep all families close to you.
-- excerpts from the novena to Saints Anne and Joachim
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"Anne is the blessed barren woman, happy mother among mothers, from whose pure womb came forth the shining temple of God, the sanctuary of the Holy Ghost, the Mother of God!"
-- St. Jerome
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"Joachim and Anne, how chaste a couple! While leading a devout and holy life in your human nature, you gave birth to a daughter nobler than the angels, whose queen she now is."
-- St. John Damascene
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Grandparents of Jesus, pray for us!
#thecandidcatholic
Hello and may the Peace of Christ be with all who read this. I was looking at some modesty testimonies today and I wanted to share so many! It is inspiring to see more people who want to dress modestly and overall practice the virtue of modesty. I wanted to share Maria’s post from a while ago. Her page was one of the many that really encouraged me to take action. God Bless you all. -Ana @sanguischristi.ana ——
Posted @withrepost • @adorotejesu 3 years ago, I would have never envisioned myself dressing this way, especially in warm weather, but WOW, I have never felt more free and feminine.
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With the way I used to dress, heads would turn, I'd get honked at and "cat called", men with bad intentions would hit on me and give me unusual amounts of attention.
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For years, my parents would tell me to wear longers dresses/skirts/shorts, higher cut tops and swimsuits that covered me up a bit/a lot more. Why did I NEVER listen? Rebellion? Wanting to dress "with the times", wanting male attention, not wanting to be hot in warm weather, easier to shop? It was probably a bit of all those things, whether intentionally or unintentionally.
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Well, I've had an epiphany! There are many things that lead me to dressing modestly, but to name a few: I realized my dignity as a woman and the sacredness of my body, the example of Our Blessed Mother and the Saints, direction from female and male friends who I admire for their deep faith, and the direction of Holy Mother Church.
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When I was separated from the Church and the Sacraments in my early 20s, I was so focused on the external, but now, my thoughts are more on the state of soul and bringing glory to God in all I do, including how I dress.
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May God bless you and lead you deeper into a life of holiness.
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#modesty #virtue #interiorlife #holiness #catholicwoman #jesus #modestfashion #chapelveil #mantilla #veilingforjesus #theprivilegeofbeingawoman #eucharist #adoration #ourlady #mothermary #fashion #summerstyle #marianmodestymovement
“I’m thankful for the scars, ‘cause without them I wouldn’t know your heart.” - I Am They, ‘Scars’
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I think there is a lot of confusion between humility and shame. I think the Church has this terrible reputation that it’s teachings are designed to lead to this internal hatred. That it teaches we are to hate ourselves because of our sinful nature and as a twisted form of manipulation, it is supposed to shame us into clinging to an oppressive institution for redemption. Now, I am not saying that I haven’t seen people approach teaching that way… so I get where the misconception comes from. I also get that that may have been an overarching narrative for some time. So it kind of makes sense that culture decided to swing too far the other way, telling everyone – ‘hey, you are totally fine. You are your own healer, mentor, friend, confidant. Do what makes you happy. There isn’t right or wrong – just right and wrong for YOU.’ However, there is a vast difference between shame and humility.
We all have scars. Every. Single. One. of us does. We have them because of the hurtful world we live in and the imperfect people that are stewards of it. The recognition of those wounds are so entirely important. It’s not important because we need to somehow recognize how terrible we are and we need to live in the shame of our faults and failings. It’s important because by recognizing our hurt, our wounds, it reveals the incredible grace contained within Christ. Encountering your biggest weakness and recognizing the love so freely given? It’s transformative, humbling, and FREEING - not oppressive or shackling. I think it’s when you start to recognize your own scars in light of the incredible grace of Christ, you’ve begun to move past just knowing ABOUT Him as an almighty judgmental deity, and you’ve finally begun to know Him as a personal savior.
Get to know the savior.
“Christ with me,
Christ before me,
Christ behind me,
Christ in me,
Christ beneath me,
Christ above me,
Christ on my right,
Christ on my left,
Christ when I lie down,
Christ when I sit down,
Christ when I arise,
Christ in the heart of every man who thinks of me,
Christ in the mouth of everyone who speaks of me,
Christ in every eye that sees me,
Christ in every ear that hears me.”
- Saint Patrick
In the past year on this platform I have become so much more aware of my words and my actions. I have kind of become known as the ‘super Catholic’ girl in a lot of ways. With that, I take great deal of responsibility to represent this faith in everything that I do and everything that I say. I don’t mean ‘bible thumping’ (for the record, that’s not effective and does more harm than good) but that I live my life fully in a way that does justice to everything this faith represents. However, I fail at that and when I do fail at it, it hits me hard. It is really amazing that I came across this quote for today. Christ in everything. Always. When we fail (which we all will) we recognize that failing. We recognize our weakness and you bring Christ there too. Christ is not just reflected in our God-given gifts. He doesn’t just want our strengths, He wants our weaknesses too. However, it’s easier said than done to bring Him there.
Christ in everything.
Happy Saint Patrick’s Day!
Ugh. Okay, sometimes I get frustrated. I get feistier than I should or I react out of emotion (generally I have a 24hour, don’t post when frustrated rule BUT that ‘publish’ button can be SUPER enticing to my ego). I try very hard to be prayerful, intentional, thoughtful, (but not calculated) and generally open to feedback on here. I think it comes with the territory on a public platform. Look, I still believe the true evangelization - the radical, world changing evangelization - won’t be done by mass marketing. It will be through you all. Through insanely confident, deeply thoughtful, and radically loving Catholics. My hope is just to encourage that.
The goal is ALWAYS souls. Always. On all sides of the aisle. Polarizing or extreme narratives only hurt that goal. I don’t believe in watering down truth but that doesn’t mean we throw out compassion and empathy. I believe in standing up for Church teaching but that also means striving to understand the depth and complexity of it, not throwing a list of rules at people and calling it ‘educating’. I believe in the importance of learning your faith, but that doesn’t mean we forget that it is a relationship with a loving Creator first and foremost.
I believe with every part of my being that this faith is true. I believe no matter how you dissect it, an honest search for truth, it will lead you to the doorstep of this faith. Why does that matter? Why do I care to share that? Because I believe this Church has the tools that best lead you into the loving arms of Creator after this life is over. And until we get there? Bring some people with you. I believe you best do that HAND IN HAND. SIDE BY SIDE. WE don’t lead people. Christ leads people. This Church leads people. WE walk beside them.
The goal is souls. The goal is heaven. The goal isn’t a particular narrative, a political party, a piece of legislation, a particular movement, a number of followers, or anything else. Everything - from every difficult Church teaching, to every apologetic topic, to every research article reiterated, to every vocation you are called to, it’s to get there.
That’s the purpose of any of this.
This faith is TRUE. You are so loved.